for meester d.

your voice shakes
me down.
i'm puddles under your admission.
i want you to konw that i might just miss you the most
and that yes, i do have to go.
i hate that once you wanted to die.
but now i know that you know life and that you know me.
and you are right about me.
all i can say is that i leave.
i won't always leave but for now it is my way, my function.
you will stay and fight with shakey hands
that are moved by solid love.
i will wish you were with me when i find my proper struggle.
i will hope that when i stop leaving
that you will have built a towering empire of kids who no longer want to die
and maybe i can visit,
and maybe i can stay.